[dropcap]I[/dropcap] was talking with some attorneys the other day about starting a Big Legal Brain fashion column. They encouraged me to do so, given that fashion is a hot topic among underemployed blog-reading people generally. According to my sources, talk of fashion on your blog also generates a lot of link juice and “Google spit” (not my words, mind you). So, I succumbed and agreed to start an occasional fashion tip column. First up: appropriate attire to wear around the home office.
Plaid Pants Are In. Plaid is back among home officing attorneys. And plaid pants go well with most home decor and with IKEA office furniture. Plus, plaid hides spills exceedingly well. I recommend the Men’s Pattern Trouser from Sligo, reasonably priced around $55 and can double for a frisbee golf outing. But I’m not talking madras. No madras. It just shouts outsourcing.
Yoga Pants Can Work, Too, So Work It. Though I don’t really do yoga but say I do, I’m a big fan of yoga pants while kicking back with a gin and juice at the home office. I recommend a Unisex Indian Wrap Yoga Pant with Sari Border. Great stuff, and brings out the best in legal thinking. You can get away with yoga shorts but, if you go that route, I highly recommend the Pillar Men’s Yoga Short w/inner liner (Dryflex version). Good quality. Finally, if you are a Clydesdale lawyer, I recommend gently worn men’s Zubaz, which were a hit in the 1980’s and remain a hit among college football mascots and balding weightlifters. They should should be making a comeback anytime soon among stay-at-home lawyers.
Say No to Fuzzy Things that Make You Sneeze. This is an avoid item, as in don’t be buying fuzzy ensemble pieces or furry knit separates that will just make you sneeze. Even though you may be working at home, there’s no need to be uncomfortable, even for the sake of fashion. Avoid angora, faux fur, and yak-based knit shirts or jackets. Same goes for furry leg warmers or fuzzy wrist cuffs. OK for a quick client meeting at the coffee shop. Not so great if you are swishing around the house all day, scaring the shit out of the cat.
Low-cut Blouses and Short Skirts. Honestly, I just said that for SEO purposes. This fashion column is reserved for men’s fashion, a sorely overlooked niche that I’m now planning to dominate. Informally, though, I polled an intern here in the office and she said “sure, why not.” So, why not, so long as you are visualizing being in court and arguing an important motion.
Put this all together and you’ve got a great fashion approach for the home office. Plaid pants, mixed with yoga pants on days you feel “sporty.” A nice knit solid shirt will complete the picture, and we’ll cover the best shirts in our next column. We’ll get to shoes, undergarments, and belts and belt buckles later. Until then, dress sharp. And let us know what works.
